We're all in the same boat, it seems.

Thanks to all my mom friends who commented and offered suggestions - and empathy - for the sibling wars being waged at our house. Thanks also to my cousin Kim who works with Head Start kids and offered some suggestions via facebook. I am thankful that so many of us are having the same experience, especially all of you that I admire for your creativity, calm demeanor, and great attitudes. It helps me not feel like the battles are all my lack of parenting skill - because you clearly have skills, and your kids are battling too.

What I mostly get is that there are no quick and easy answers here. After writing yesterday's post, I tried really hard to make things better today, and incorporated some of the suggestions offered. Here are my thoughts:

- I paid attention as much as I could. I am prone to wander away with my thoughts (or just mealtime preparations), and ignored children seem to fight more to get my attention (I feel dumb for mentioning this).

- We moved our bodies in (somewhat) constructive ways. Blue had a rec center class today, and we also spent a good deal of time racing around the house. When I thought we might descend into chaos, we took a walk, even though it was hot, threatening thunderstorms, and I had other things to do.

- I tried to get a few quality minutes in with each kid so that they felt like I was paying attention. For Pink, this was during Blue's class, and for Blue, during Pink's nap. I didn't do any special projects today or any significant meal prep so that freed up some time.

- I tried really hard not to raise my voice. I'm kind of a loud person, so my "inside voice" is already at increased decibels, and I tend to shout up the stairs rather than walk up and talk to whoever's attention I'm looking for.

- I checked out the site from Vanderbilt University recommended by Kim. Certainly a lot of good information there about how to help little ones build pro-social behaviors.

Thanks to everyone for offering support and similar stories. I believe we are all trying our very hardest to raise our kids to be happy, healthy, functioning members of society, and I appreciate all the moms who offer a listening (blogging?) ear when I become the unhappy, unhealthy, totally non-functioning person who can't get her kids to behave.

This, too, shall pass - and one day, they'll have kids of their own, and we can snicker...

With a sibling like this, who needs enemies?

That stupid bumpersticker that I used to jeer at, "Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children" is coming back to bite me. Blue is going to drive me insane. He is a good kid, uses his manners most of the time, takes turns, and does what I ask if not the first time, usually the second; but there is one thing about him that is going to push me over the edge - it's the way he treats his sister. Much of the time, they play nicely together. Blue is in charge of the games, but plays along with Pink when she puts her own spin on stuff. But sometimes, whether for reasons of hunger or boredom or whatever, the relationship spirals out of control to hitting, yelling, pushing, slamming doors, and biting (what is he, 2?). I CAN'T STAND IT!!!! It makes me want to hit, push, and bite someone. If he doesn't watch it, she's going to be an only child.

I blame his mother. She's an only child and never had any sibling relations to deal with. Or maybe his father since he's the oldest of a bunch and knew all the tricks. Regardless, I need help. Ideas. Something. My usual parenting technique (thank you, Kazdin method) is to reward and encourage appropriate behavior and (try to) ignore inappropriate behavior. How do I reward someone for not hitting?

Anyone out there with kids about as far apart as mine that has successfully dealt with this, please, give me some hints.

BlueGrass and BlueShield

I am in charge of most of the paperwork that filters through our household. Bills, insurance paperwork, car registration renewals - I generally do the filling out of forms, addressing of envelopes, writing of checks, and general tracking of stuff and how and when it gets handled. In the last few weeks, I have done more than my usual amount of paperwork for some pretty random reasons, but I just noticed that a really high percentage of this stuff goes to Lexington, Kentucky. I wonder why - does Lexington have some sort of monopoly on insurance and loan paperwork? Or is it that people with a last name in my part of the alphabet have been assigned geographically to be processed in the bluegrass state?

The temperature is not the only thing rising.

It's summer in Texas when the best parking spot is determined by shade instead of distance, and you discover that a car seat buckle can double as a branding iron. It's also summer in Texas when the love-hate relationship with baking sets in for me.

I love to bake, but in the summer, anything with yeast makes me thrilled. It rises at supersonic speeds, and if I'm a little behind on my timing, a few minutes out on the patio makes up for it. This morning before church, I baked 5 dozen rolls. The yeast start practically climbed out of the bowl, and I had to rearrange my other activities because instead of an hour to rise, the rolls were ready to go in the oven after 20 minutes on the counter. A few days ago, I made oatmeal bread, which is generally kind of hit or miss for me because the dough is so heavy and the yeast start is unusual. Nevertheless, a few minutes outside, and everything turned out fine.

The only problem with everything being the temperature of a warm oven is that turning on the actual oven is not so appealing. Although, I might just be able to get around turning the oven on - I'm pretty sure that it was close to 350 degrees in the attic the last time I went up, maybe I can just bake up there.

In ballet, like life, it's all about spin.

"Pink, let's put your leotard on"
"No, I'm busy"
"Pink, it's time to go"
"Just a minute"
"Pink, you can have some lipstick if you get dressed right now"
"Coming, mommy"

In keeping with our summer of over scheduled lessons (ie, golf, tennis, other sports, swimming lessons, piano), we signed Pink up for ballet lessons. She thought it was a marvelous idea, and has spent the last week gearing up for the lessons by telling every member of the family that they would not be allowed into the room for her lessons - we would all have to wait outside.

She practiced before we left by demonstrating fifth position:

Of course, once we came into the classroom, Pink's big talk about everyone waiting outside turned into a plea to hold mommy's hand and sit on her lap. I managed to get 3 feet away for a second to snap this picture before Pink noticed and insisted that I sit within arms reach. What's so scary about a ballet teacher?
With her hand firmly in mine, we practiced running on tiptoe making "princess" and "beachball" arms, pointing our toes, and some stretches. For a first class, not too bad. To hear her tell it, she had a marvelous time and was totally into it - and earned a teddy bear sticker for all her hard work.

Three years in, and I'm still learning to survive

I originally started blogging to chronicle our family's journey from Washington, DC to Texas. In fact, one of my first posts was about some of the stranger things I had noticed about this area. Now, almost three years later, I am starting to embrace the stranger things - or at least, not be horrified by them. The book pictured has been a great help. It was written as a humorous take on life in Texas from an outsider's perspective. While it does make me laugh (out loud sometimes), it is also extremely comforting to know that I am not the only person to have moved to this area and thought things were a little different...but in a good way.

Mind you, I still haven't come to terms with everything, and I've spent most of today trying to work "yall" into a sentence (I just can't do it), but it's getting better. We're feeling more settled, I've stopped ranting about the lack of grocery delivery and the overabundance of firearms (or at least, stopped ranting as loudly - note the firearms), and the whole family has started to establish friendships. I still don't understand the obsession with football, I still snicker every time I drive past the MaryKay world headquarters building, and I'm dying for some decent Ethiopian food; but as a family, we have discovered golf, learned to style our hair for heat and humidity, and gloat each time we can have a picnic on our lawn in December.

Like it or not, Texas is growing on me. Who knows, maybe next year I'll buy cowboy boots.

Making Up is Hard to Do

This picture was taken in the adults' bathroom. MY bathroom (okay, Red has half of it). That stool Pink is standing on - not normally in this bathroom; she brought it in.
So that she could get to my lipsticks, which I keep at the very back of my counter (after discovering that "in the drawer" was not safe).

After trying out several options, Pink finally settled on this one, and wore it proudly for about 1 minute until I attacked her with a tissue (before she attacked my white sheets in the next room).

Today I learned:

- Some 2-year-olds really are good problem solvers - get a stool, grab the stuff you want, figure out how to open and twist up a lipstick.

- Some divas are born. I swear I don't feed this, but Pink doesn't consider herself dressed until she has "accessories" - like a necklace, bracelet, or feather-accented headband.

- Some kids can't sleep through thunder storms. Pink was supposed to be napping during the time these pictures were taken. Blue, who rarely naps, slept for almost 2 hours through thunder so loud the windows were rattling.

- Some mothers can justify anything. I spent this whole episode thinking things like "oh, she's practicing her fine motor skills by taking the lids off", but never thinking things like "if I were a decent disciplinarian, she wouldn't be trashing my stuff"

- Some stages of life are much too fleeting. Pink is adorable right now. She's generally happy about stuff, says "I love you" a lot, and even when she says "no", she's cute about it. I know harder ages are coming, but I just love this little girl right now. She's trying so hard to be big, but still wants to cuddle with her mommy sometimes.